Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Morning Pill #5 it is SO over

i wish to have the ability to orate long strings of utter profanity.
i dont think im really angry. anger would be a luxury. i dont think im happy as well. no.
apathy.
its all calloused now. unfeeling.
i am the gray color.
i think i fried my organ for feeling as a survival mechanism. because THAT was too traumatic if i let that one in.
the trick ? Lie. Lie to yourself.
Because when i saw her, it beat. and i had to crush that which beats.
make it still.
crushed.
it doesnt beat anymore.
i am smile.

3 Comments:

Blogger Tingkagol said...

Hahaha! CRUSH IT! CRUSH IT REALL HARDD!!!

7:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i've been reading your entries all along. you write so well. it's my daily habit to check your piece. i hope you write more.


you reminded me of Holden in the book called The Catcher in the rye by J.D. Salinger =)

3:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I feel for you. I was like you
a long time ago. Trust me, you'll
survive. I did.

5:36 AM  

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