Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Morning Pill # 18

in one of our afternoon pre-siesta talks, i asked the question that would bring my perception to a crashing halt. a hard stop. epic fail. before, i go ahead and unveil the one question, i feel i need to bring some frame into this canvas of paint.

it all started with a website. stuff white people like. now would be the best time to open a new window and google that phrase and visit the site. it is a hilarious, tongue-in cheek look at not just 20 to 30something white people but elitism and the pretentiousness that comes with it. i read through the site and snickered and laughed at the self-deprecating humor the author has. amused at how much of the lists were similar to my own personal list, i asked her "am i really 'white'?" with air-quotes. i use the air quotes because, i am racially asian.

no sooner had those words left my mouth, when she not only replied with hesitation but also with a smile. the smile that you know comes to hide the strain to hold back the words in her head and to find the time to re-arrange them when it comes out. a mona lisa of-course-you-air-head-i-cant-believe-you-had-to-ask-me-that smile. a beautiful but unenigmatic smile. its the smile every guy doesnt want to see.

so, after what seemed like hours of listening to how much most of my life, my choices, my way of thinking, mimics the culture. the devil on my shoulder couldn't hold it anymore and bent over to my ear and said 'so, why is she with you?'

luckily, i dont listen to phantasms of shoulder-sitting devils completely. and while it was that question that i heard in my ears, my mind understood a different one.

Should we love someone inspite of the differences or should we love someone despite of it?

What draws the line between ever-after and settling?


Blogger Tingkagol said...

I thought 'despite' and 'in spite of' are the same? Care to clarify maling? hehe.

And you're not 'white'.

1:01 AM  
Blogger Tingkagol said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

9:03 PM  

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